Something the Mohican said inspired me to write this one....
I painted this last summer. It is titled crossroads. My great love once said to me, "paint how you feel..." I painted this after my love and I parted ways. It was my depiction of what occurred between us.
Life brings us to crossroads...We choose the path we will take.
I am a firm believer of CHOICE THEORY- the only person whose behavior we can control, is our own. We cannot make someone who chooses to leave- stay. But we can control how we will behave after. No one can make us follow them down a path we refuse to tread. We choose which path shall be ours. If it is one that is also theirs, we walk side by side... if not we part ways once we hit the crossroads.
I shared a beautiful path with him. It was true and intense and magnificent in every way and at the crossroads we parted ways. At the crossroads I let go of pain and bitterness and embraced acceptance and understanding.
I am somewhere completely different now and on a different note I say- At a crossroads, I went astray... Enmeshed as I am in confusion and questions, someone now beckons me with a reminder of the truth. Our paths crossed once before but back then we did not interact. Why at this point in time is he brought once more to intersect my path... there is a purpose in it. Things happen for a reason... Is he here to remind me of truth. He challenges my complacence. That is a good thing. I have become complacent. At this new crossroads I stand. A new struggle for understanding. The choice is mine...
How existential! When brought to a crossroads how shall we choose? When made aware how shall we act? If life is a given and so is free will, choices...choices are all that remain. To want is forever. Restlessness is mine. My depth is an ocean. My spirit seeks to fly. The more I learn, the less sure I am. The more that I see, I am content in my own company, with my thoughts, and my musings, and layered meanings like hidden treasures hold me enmeshed...
The choices I make, make me who I am. I choose to sit still and think and be. To me this is agony. To me this is bliss.
4 comments:
I am in awe of your ability to translate emotion. Remember how both Gogol Gaguly and his father had to take steps backwards before they was able to move forward.
I guess we're all in one way or another trying to find our own paths. Paths that would lead us on; and somehow the people we meet along the way aren't just bread-crumbs but they end up being our paths. And that is my agony and my bliss. None of us end up where we want to be, but then the joy is in the journey, and not the destination.
You have really painted one of the biggest and most often occurred real life experience..we all are bound to have a
rendezvous with our crossroads in life..sooner or later..
we always speak of crossroads where the decision lies in our hands, our fate can be turned by our choices..after taking
the steps ...either rave about how indigenous our modus operandi was for handling the then seemingly insurmountable barrier
or our choice was foolhardy!
i was melancholic for few dayz about the crossroads,pondering over the past,the people dear to me in the past from whose
experiences have immensely impacted my outlooking towards life and their decision making has enriched mine.Can i say
fortunatley or unfortunately i havent reached any intersections in life..but the dear ones who have...preambulating a down
the road of their proclivity was not their prerogative.Some crossroads dictate the path to be tread to people no matter how
righteous they were to begin with.
i have observed closely few examples of families who lost a grown up child to cancer at age 30 infront of their
very eyes.women happily married suddenly being widowed at a young age,stranded with their children.But it is amazing how
emotionally resilient humans are ,yes they have moved on life and inured themeselves to manage life.
i was wondering what would make you more elegiac and doleful?To lose some one dear to you as ordained by fate,
cognizant of the fact that you wont meet them ever again in your life time,may be you adore so much that you might not be
able to yoke with someone else after them..
Or breaking up with some one you never could coexist with, wary of the notion that you can move on and descry someone who
resonates at the same frequency as yours!
I think losing someone the first way is much more saturnine..i donno what you think...but it might seem intrepid to some or scatterbrained to others to even make the comparison..as parveen shakir said...
Kis shart pay khailoon gi piya pyar ki baazi?
Jeeton to tumhay paoon haroon to piya teri!
@mohican
well said: "the joy is in the journey and not the destination"
indeed.
Gogol... when he realizes the significance of Gogol he is Nikhil... and how ironic that he only finds happiness in Gogol. Acceptance of self... road to peace
It is amazing how emotionally resilient humans are...
but then I have also seen the wear and tear that humans go through as a result of misuse. In my line of work, that is my burden...
In the first case at least you had the love- but was it ever appreciated for what it was?
In the second case you never did have that love- so are forever a skeptic and ever so discriminating that your heart will never let you trust because you have an ideal but yet you doubt it's existence
Lionel Ritchie said
Relatively speaking... contrast makes it go...
can one see the good if all there is, is good. we know of good because we know of bad... if we did not know bad would the good be felt as good?
Post a Comment