ACK!!!! help..........

CALLING ALL MY TECHIE PEEPS!!!

This is NOT a fire drill.
It is time.
I NEED you!!

My TV just died... sigh... and I went out looking to buy a new one with My pal Rebbecca in tow. To all those familiar with my $3500 laptop purchase (!!!) (I blame it on the cute green eyed sales guy- who BTW kept inquiring if I was a gamer [ i could be a gamer] and if I was going to be using it to edit movies [movies is my middle name, thinks i...]and whether I needed to work with large quantity data processing [i do social science research- of course i need to process large quantities of data!]...sigh.... i now have a VERY high tech, super computer that i use to blog and photo shop, e mail and facebook from...!!! and i have no clue how to work any of the other "stuff... and fluff") Super sigh... it is the memory of those beautiful eyes that makes it bearable...

But

I digress...

There is the issue of my TV. I need a new one. I went out to buy one the other day... at Circuit City... same place I bought my digi camera... remember .... anyway... who should I see but the same sales guy. Shrimpy fellow... very knowledgeable about techie stuff. (Rebbecca wanders off to go snooze on the comfy couch in front of the magnificently large Screen). Shrimpy he eyes me from afar... he recognizes me, I can tell. He comes over. He half smiles- half chuckles and inquires what I am in the market for. I gulp and tell him,
"My TV died..."
"My condolences..." he offers
I see the teasing mirth in his (not quite so) sincere eyes...
"I need a new one" I state..
"I'm sure" he responds
"I don't know much about them..." I confess
"Oh I believe you" he says much too quickly
"So the thing is..." I start
"Why don't you tell me what's out there?"
"Sure" he takes a breath and we begin...
There are Sony's, Panasonic's, Magnavox's, AKAI's, Sanyo's, LCDs, Plasma's (isn't that a blood component????) My mind is spinning...

I decide on a Sony. Problem is my DVD player is a Panasonic. I express my dilemma to the dude. He does not seem to understand...
"They won't match." I state flatly.
"What won't match?" (dude)
"My TV and DVD player" (me)
"Oh they can still work with each other. They are still compatible. The company doesn't make a difference..." (dude)
"I understand that... but they won't match!" (me)
"I don't get it." (dude)
"You see, the TV will be a Sony and the DVD player and Sound system will be a Panasonic.. It won't match.." (me)

He finally gets it. He looks at me funny, but he understands my meaning... I start to feel very out of place here, but decide to plunge forth without calling JB in a panic to ask him to HELP ME!!!!

We finally find a Panasonic to my liking. It's silver...
"So??" (dude)
"You see..." I hesitate...
"You like it?" (dude)
"Yes... but..." (me)
"But..."(dude)
"(sigh) it's silver..." (me)
"Let me guess- The other stuff isn't silver?" (dude)
"Exactly!" (me) (very enthusiastically... elated that he understands... oh wait... no he doesn't... wait a minute... that is sarcasm i detect... !! ... sigh...)
"Do you have silver DVD players...?" I ask tentatively...
He looks at me hard to see if I'm kidding.
"Will you be looking at silver Surround sound too?" "We have a real deal on them and they're Panasonic..." (dude)

I begin to feel funny in my tummy...

But I go along... We finally find the perfect match. Panasonic. Silver Finish. TV(LCD). DVD(Blue Ray)(whatever that is... sounds like a sting ray... fish? ... oooooohhh sushi would be great for lunch!!!.... focus Shahnaz!) Surround sound system with two sub-woofers (it barks!!??).... He does up the numbers.... $$$$$$... ka-ching! ka-ching!...

My friend Rebbecca strolls by to see if I'm doing okay. Excitedly I show her what I intend to buy... She does the math in her head and then pulls me aside...

"Shahnaz, hon...."(her)
"Yeah"(me)
"Remember how you always tell me to be straight with you..."(her)
"Yeah"(me)
"Well... you see... you have a DVD player and Speakers... you came to get a TV!"(her)
"Yeah"(me)
"Snickerdoodles!!!"(me)
"Yeah" (her)
"DUDE!!"(me)
"I need to get out of here" (me)
"Umm Hmm..." (her)

We leave. Me in a daze... panasonyvox... blood-cells and barking speaker... daze....

"You okay?"(her)
"I need a new TV!" (me)
"I Know" (her)
"My TV died!!" (me)
"I know, hon.. I know...." (her)
"I'm hungry" (me)
"Me too... lunch?" (her)
"OOOhhhhh oooooohhhh SUSHI!!??" (me)
"Sushi sounds good!" (her)
"We should probably bury my dead TV" (me)(chuckling... :P)
"You make me laugh!" (her)(laughing)
"I know... I can't help it..." (me)(laughing)
"It's the "ness" you know... the "Shahnaz-ness"..." (me) (laughing!)
"I agree. I love your "ness"!" (her)(laughing also)
"I still need a TV" (me) (very seriously)
"You still need one" (her) (also very seriously)
"We'll look...after we bury the old one...." (me)
"And eat" (her)
"We do need sustenance to stay strong. Sushi! Blue (sting) Ray Sushi! Sushi that barks! (sub woofs!! to be exact!) and has Plasma!" (me)

Lots of laughter... (me and her)



I still need a TV!!!!


I need help!

HELP!!

gulp!