And while on the subject-

I hate myself for loving you...

In true Joan Jett style!!

;)

Look alike-

So Martha at work has been on my case telling me that I look like Joan Jett-
She had seen an article about a movie about her and there were pictures in the Rhino Times or the News and Record (can't remember which) and she said the actress playing her looked nothing like her.

"I wanted to send in a picture of you!" She said. You look just like her. "You look more like Joan Jett than Joan Jett does these days!!!" She stated...

"Who is she?" I asked.

"She's a rocker-"

"Aahhh... Okay then. I like looking like a rocker."

And today I finally looked her up and Ambar walked in and said, "Is that you in you rocker goth stuff!!!" I laughed. I guess I do look a little bit like her when I get all dolled and rocked and gothed up!

Ladies and gentlemen- I present Joan Jett-

Mothers day-

I wake up to the clink of china, and the door opens as my sleep clouded eyes fight the cobwebs of dreamland where I am faintly aware that I was whimpering in my sleep for lost love... I try to make sense of what is happening and fight past the morning heartache of missing "him" yet again and this is the sight that meets my eyes...

My lovely child walks in with a plate in her hand and announces with great satisfaction,
"This is what is called breakfast in bed!!!"

Acutely aware that my 10 year old child has prepared me a meal all by herself I sit up in bed, amazed and overwhelmed. I feel overjoyed that I have this sweet unconditional love in my life and guilty because lately having lost in love I have felt so miserable... I feel a lump come up in my throat. She is too good to be true. This angel in my life, my little ray of sunshine-

She has made me scrambled eggs, toast and tea! All by herself. My head goes through the calculations of how much thought and effort went into the preparation. And then amazement at the fact that she managed to jump over the doggie gate with her plate in hand and carry it all upstairs. And even more wonder at the planning that had to have gone into it, not to mention how early she had to get up to pull it off.

I am teary eyed as I tell her I love her so much! And how she is the best thing in my life. "No one ever made me breakfast in bed before!" I tell her...
"Are you serious?" she asks. "Everyone should get it especially you- you are wonderful..."

I feel the tears come again and I lean in to kiss her. She hops on the bed with me and we share the breakfast and there is a moment of such deep satisfaction. My life is good. That done we get to cuddle and it feels so good. I notice another achyness creep into my heart. I wish he was here and things would be perfect is my thought and then I immediately push it aside, it is what it is... life is perfect just as it is. There is perfection in every moment and lately I have overlooked that. I find peace and comfort in my daughters embrace and she in mine and there is an ageless bond that is reinforced. We get up and get dressed and head out into the world.

It is a good day to spend with my mini me- We take care of business and lunch like ladies. We attend to tasks and then coffee and dessert like socialites! After a lazy afternoon she gives me a card she has made. Beautifully crafted it has her fingerprints all over it.

Dear Mom,
Thanks for everything you have done for me. You always take care of me and get me anything I want. You make me very happy.
Love, Ambar

I look up and she says, "Really mom. It's true. You are amazing. You give me everything I need. You make me very happy."

And I feel my eyes tear up again. She gives me a hug and a kiss and runs off to play while I write my little piece.

We're headed out again and we shall dinner like the queen and princess that we are and then cuddle some more in front of the telly... yes life is good, and I had an amazing mother's day...

Happy Mothers Day to everyone-

And P.S.
Happy Graduation day to all my pals-
Got the invites,
Saw the banners,
Would've been there,
But I had a date with an angel who made me breakfast in bed!
Love you lots!
Hugs-
XXX

At the touch of love-

At the touch of love
Everyone becomes a poet...
(Plato)

Cinco de Mayo!

One of the many reasons I celebrate Cinco de Mayo-

Sexy babe Antonio Banderas ;)



Get your Cinco on!!

soul

tell me a word- she wrote
and a word came back- soul

soul

like the waters of an ocean
separate yet entwined
like the sands of time
endless and sublime
like the essence of knowledge
like knowing
being
seeing
so are we-
oh soul
and you breathe in me
oh soul
and you heard my call
oh soul
some days there is the me
only you can understand
oh soul
and i prayed to HIM
who is the third
of you and me
and I said
my soul feels empty
my pen lacks ink
my words need our rhythm
the dance of the dervish
oh soul
come dance with me today
in ecstasy
again let's play
and build our web of words

oh soul of my soul
you heard me this day...

Like this---

---- When someone asks what it means to "die for love," point here.... The soul sometimes leaves the body, the returns. When someone doesn’t believe that, walk back into my house..... Like This...

and yes today i missed you so much
where have the months gone
and you are nowhere to be found
in the darkness of the night
when i called your name
and you heard me in silence
and you felt the same
who hears my soul now
who knows my name
i wished you were here again
so i might cry and say to you

"tell me a word..."

and like so many times before
you would hear the thought that my mind spoke
and hear the beat
that my heart made

some things just are
and they have no name
so it was with us
"ek shahana andaaz hai..."
awaz day kahan hai
---

Everything in between

At first there was love...
And then came
Distance
Fear
Confusion
Peace
Understanding
Happiness
Battles
Wars
Anger
Lies
Deceit
Cheating
Hurting
Victory
Loss---

And then there was love...with everything in between

And so he lay
In his room
In agony
And so she sat
In hers
In pain

And yet there was love
And the world keeps turning
Days keep coming
Sun keeps shining
Life keeps happening
And everything in between.