Sunday, October 19, 2014

On my knees...

The thing about a broken back is,
I find myself either face down on the floor 
Or on my knees often-
Both, I have discovered 
Are an excellent position
For me to pray

I vowed 
When I was very little
That if I ever bowed my head
It would only be before God
So it is fitting that it is bowed often before Him now

Another thing about being down there
Is that I am learning how to fight 
From the ground
It is a different kind of fight
One I am not used to
I usually fight on my feet
I am quick on my feet
But I guess
The Lord
In his wisdom decided
I needed to learn how to fight
A different way

I learn fast once acceptance kicks in
Humility follows
And then comes turmoil
The struggle of impatient ones
Over eager novices
Like myself

But like I read somewhere
"What is to give light must endure burning..."
I shall endure
And burn
And while on the floor face down
And on my knees
I shall say a prayer
Each time
To Him
That is 


Thursday, October 16, 2014


I am more than my physical form
I am more than what I seem
I am a soul
And when I see
What I am
I have no fear
Fear is a physical thing
Faith is a soul thing
When I have faith
I am without fear
Not fear less...
For I am never less than
Or more than
I am a soul
And a soul
 A soul is!
A soul 

Sunday, October 12, 2014


On the drive home
As the Bug and I talked
About life
And strife
I looked over
And saw her cry
"What's up Bug?"
"These are tears of respect mom, you have no idea how much I love and respect who you are, and how amazing you are!"
And just like that
It comes full circle
I don't need much validation
But validation from the Bug
Moon and stars

Friday, October 10, 2014

The love that never was...

This reminds me of me when I was little-

I would run away from home... Say my goodbyes before I left in hopes that someone would ask me to stay- no one ever did...

So I would leave in hopes that someone would come after me- but no one ever did.

Forever after we continue to chase the love that was not returned- all the while missing out on the love that was waiting with open arms.

Today I am struggling to learn how to recognize the love that is always there-

Everyday a new lesson. 


The universe will give me everything I need-
(This one from Hanya all the way from England, comes at such a timely hour to remind me of a truth I will need to propel me forward... Her words "this one is for you, about you...")

It is a wonderful thing to be loved, truly loved for everything that I am!

With a smile I will walk on-

Monday, October 6, 2014

Defining moments

There are these moments when it happens...
An awareness-
It doesn't just dawn on you
It hits you in the face 
Like a ton of bricks
And every fibre of your being and existence is aware
And in congruence
The moment when you realize 
Your truth
You get up
And shed all the lies
You bought into
And a being ness happens
A solidifying occurs
All your blurry edges become clear 
And you become 
A stronger
More refined
Well defined

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Eid and hajj mabruk-

When He calls you go...

Eid Mubarak to all